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Gimmicks
Monday, August 19, 2002
Many women in the world NEED my worthy advice, so I have decided to write a book filled with my witty bits of knowledge.
Title: The Second Wive's Bible Chapters include:
1. This doesn't seem so bad - first dates with a man who has children. He's sweet, single and heterosexual. He talks about his darling children and brings pictures.
2. Meeting the Psycho X - they all have them. You are officially The New Girlfriend. BE AWARE: she won't be anything you ever imagined. Her nice comments are tinged with sarcasm and she will "warn" you about the guy. Do not under-estimate this first meeting, it will, most likely, define your entire relationship with her. Believe me, ONE thing she does/says will be worthy of an entire dinner conversation with your girlfriends.
3. Second thoughts - reality of dating a man with his children. Let's go out becomes let's take the kids with us! This can be a bit too cozy in the first few months, not just for you, but for the Psycho X, who will hear all about it from the excited kids.
4. She said/she said - subsequent dealings with the Psycho X. The joys of finding out all you have done wrong with HER darling children. You WILL be blamed for very cold and bellyache they experience from now on. This is quite humorous when she decides she doesn't want Another Woman with her children, despite living with the guy she cheated with during her marriage. Threats of "Going back to Court!" abound.
5. Reality TV - NOT! Those little cutie-pies are now learning showing their little devil horns and DAMMIT! Walmart won't take them back without a receipt. A few months of this and you will be sending in a tape of your typical day to "Survivor" and offering the kids as ideas for "Fear Factor." You know the kids are thinking, "You ARE the weakest link! G'bye!" every time they look at you. You feel like a failure and know the REAL meaning behind, "Family Feud." Jerry Springer is a nice respite from the world outside your dates with The Man You Love.
That's all for now. More later. Sunshine - Walking on Sunshine -
8/19/2002 08:41:00 AM
